The Paleo Mama

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How Are You Protecting Your Children from Predators?

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frankiememe

  • Sixty-seven percent of all victims of sexual assault reported to law enforcement agencies were juveniles (under the age of 18) 34% of all victims were under age 12.
  • One of every seven victims of sexual assault reported to law enforcement were under age 6.
  • Convicted rape and sexual assault offenders serving time in State prisons report that two-thirds of their victims were under the age of 18, and 58% of those–or nearly 4 in 10 imprisoned violent sex offenders–said their victims were aged 12 or younger.
  • 80% of inmates serving time in State Prison for intimate violence had injured or killed their victim.” (Criminal Offenders Statistics)
  • “The median age of the victims of imprisoned sexual offenders was less than 13 years old.” (Bureau of Justice Standards.)
  • “96% of female rape victims in 1991, younger than 12 years old, knew their attackers. 20% were victimized by their fathers or step-fathers.” (US Department of Justice)
  • 3 in 4 child victims of violence were female.
  • 4 in 10 child victims of violence suffered either a forcible rape or another injury

Do you have a pit in your stomach like I do? I could keep going with these scary statistics…I haven’t even mentioned child pornography which is rampant.

The truth is, we all have known someone who has been sexually molested or raped. And the possibility that even one of us has been molested or raped is 50%. That’s sick. It just makes my skin crawl. It makes me want to live off the grid somewhere and shelter my children from any harm. Why aren’t there more people talking about this? I am always the odd-ball when I say that my 4 year old already understands this stuff. No, I’m not teaching her about sex and things people can do to her. I’m teaching her how to be a little lady. I’m teaching her about secrets. I’m teaching her about how to understand danger.

It is never too early to teach your kids about “good touch, bad touch.” I think we, as parents, need to stop shying away from things that make US uncomfortable. This isn’t about us. This is about protecting our children. This is about saving them from years of hurt, confusion, and anger. This is about saving them from going down a dangerous path of drug addition, of being so hungry for love that they will sleep with anyone to find it. This is about rescuing our children.

Our children need us. They need us to be that superhero for them. All little girls want a hero, and if they aren’t getting it from us (from dads), then they are going to look for it elsewhere. As girls, we fantasize about this…why do you think all fairy tales involved a princess and a savior? Who is her savior?

Let’s not wait for something to happen to save them. Let’s start now.

How can we protect them NOW? 

I stumbled upon Pattie Fitzgerald website while watching the news a while back who teaches “Tricky People” not “Stranger Danger,” because a tricky person could be someone that your child knows. Here are some things that I have learned from her Prevention tips and a few other things that I suggest:

  1. First we need to realize that from the statistics, most of the abusers, or “Tricky People”  come from close relationships with the family. With child molestation, not only are the children being duped into keeping quiet and believing whatever lies the abuser is saying, but the parents are being duped to. As parents and protectors of our young, we need to stand up when we are uncomfortable and say no.
  2. Second, we need to be willing to be uncomfortable…willing to possibly offend another adult. My daughter has a good friend. Her friend’s dad wanted to take the two girls out for ice cream one day. I remember when the question was asked to me. At first, I felt it. I felt the uneasieness and I didn’t want to say no because I was going to be uncomforable saying no to someone. Yes, maybe, he was just trying to do something nice. But, guess what?! I don’t know him from sin. So, I worked through those feelings of uneasiness and I, politely, declined. It’s better to feel uncomfortable than to live with a burden of guilt.
  3. Third, we need to teach our kids that IT’S OK TO SAY NO TO ADULTS. I think we, too often, in trying to teach our children to respect their elders, we teach them that an adult is always right. WRONG! Don’t teach them this. Teach them that if something doesn’t feel right, then to come to you. We need to create a level of respect and trust among our kids. And if you are teaching them that they should do whatever an “adult” says, then there is so much risk in that. Teach them that adults are human too and if an adult wants something from them, then they need to come to you and ask.
  4. Fourth, we need to stop forcing our kids to hug and kiss someone. Don’t make your child do something that they don’t want to do. How are we teaching them to be cautious of pedophiles if we are just going to force them to be affectionate with someone that they don’t want to? Isn’t that the same thing that pedophiles do?
  5. We need to talk to them. My daughter is only 4, but I am, already, trying to create confidence in our relationship. I don’t want subjects of sex and touch and affection to be awkward. I want to be able to talk, openly, with her about sex, about healthy touch, about relationships with the opposite sex. How many of us learned what sex was from friends, internet, or TV? Thankfully, I had a mother who I, oh so vividly, remember teaching me about sex. In fact, the image of her drawing it out is forever branded in my mind. But, I learned from someone I TRUSTED what it was. I learned what healthy sex was. I learned that it was something that I could talk about with my parents.
  6. Listen to your child. If they don’t want to be around a particular person, a babysitter, a family member…this may be a red flag. Don’t force them to do things they don’t want to do.
  7. Look up local predators on your state’s database. All states post predators and where they live. You can select a 1 mile radius and see how many live around you in that area.

Let’s do this better. Let’s do it better together. Let’s be more alert. Let’s be willing to be uncomfortable. We can’t save everyone, but we can do our best to be the hero that our kids need. Let’s do it now!

There are some great children books that we can read to our kids that teach them different aspects of understanding danger:

What measures do you take to make sure your kids are safe from predators? 

 

 

 

 

5 Reasons Why I Love Waldorf

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Maybe you have heard the words, “Waldorf Education” or  seen “Waldorf toys“ floating around, yet you’re not sure what it is. Maybe you have seen some of the unique, handmade “Waldorf” gifts or your friend sends their kid to a Waldorf school. Maybe, you think it’s a movement that crunchy moms believe in, or maybe, the idea of it interests you but you just don’t understand it. Let me try to explain in the simplest terms what Waldorf education is and why I love Waldorf inspired toys.

Waldorf education comes from the teachings of Rudolf Steiner. Steiner developed a philosophy known as anthroposophy. This philosophy believes that in order to understand the workings of the universe, people must first have an understanding of humanity. The focus of education varies depending on what age or grade level the child is. The early years there is a focus on artistic expression. As the child matures, the process of scientific inquiry and discovery becomes the focus in upper school studies. Music and art are central components in a Waldorf education. Learning how to express thought and emotion is taught through art and music (source).

So, with that definition in mind, let me tell you why I love Waldorf and Waldorf inspired toys:

1. Waldorf Toys are natural and non-toxic. They are created with wood and safe for babies and toddlers to chew. In fact, many teething babies prefer the texture of wood to chew on as opposed to plastic. I like this teething toy (click here) for teething babies. It’s made of a circular wooden ring out of birch. The baby can safely hold and chew on it and you have the peace of mind that no harsh chemicals are getting into your baby’s body.

2. Waldorf schools use a hands on approach to education. There is much controversy surrounding the need for technology in education. Many Waldorf schools believe in a low tech approach to teaching…especially in the younger years. And, to me, it makes sense. Would you prefer your child learning from an iPad app or a teacher who is focusing on educationally nourishing the whole child?

3. Waldorf Toys are simple and promote imaginative play. Take a look at this AWESOME busy bag (click here). My kids have this set and they LOVE it. In fact, I need to order another one because they always fight over it. But, it’s so simple and creative. I keep mine in my purse and pull it out at restaurants and in the car for the kids to play with. The little people have no expression on their face so that the kids can create whatever kind of emotion that they want to. The little shovel and bowl has been created to do so many things from shoveling imaginative dirt to serving a pot of steamy “Stone Soup“. If I was to recommend ONE thing to keep in your purse for your baby, toddler or kids, it would be this.

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4. Waldorf toys are often simple without a lot of detail. My daughter has THIS doll that she cherishes. It has no face. It has no expression. It’s simple and made of a beautiful antique hankerchief. Atop it’s head is a wooden birch ring, which makes it a perfect companion for teething babies, as well as assisting growing toddlers in their fine motor skills. Why do I love this doll so much? Because it’s not Barbie. It’s not a plastic doll with a fixed expression. This doll can be happy, but it can, also, be sad. I think this is so important for children to be able to create emotion in their imaginative play and not be forced to stick with a still, plastic face.

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5. Waldorf toys encourage imitation. In a Waldorf school or a Waldorf-inspired home, you will see lots of toys that cause the child to imitate adults. One example of this include kitchen toys so that little boys and girls can grow up appreciating the importance of cooking and eating healthy. A few other examples include brooms/dustpans to imitate cleaning and tools, to imitate taking care of the house. These are so important to give to children so that they can imitate and learn to appreciate the value of real-life skills. Playing games on a computer or an iPad does not nurture this imitation in children.

Conclusion and Special Deal for My Readers:

These are just 5 of the main reasons why I love Waldorf and use Waldorf toys in my own home. I’m sure there are plenty more and I would love to hear from you!

Also, please visit my favorite Etsy store, Clover & Birch. Clover & Birch is where lots of my Waldorf-inspired toys came from. The shop owner, Taylor, carries lots of eco-conscious and vintage inspired toys and teething toys! She, also, makes a beautiful line of nursing necklaces (click here to see) that serve a triple purpose: a beautiful accessory for mommy to wear, a playful toy for your baby to play with while nursing, and a teething necklace for your baby when they aren’t nursing.

Great news! Taylor from Clover & Birch is offering all my readers 15% off if you order from her shop!

Click here to order and get 15% off Waldorf-inspired toys, teething necklaces, and more! 

(Coupon Code: PALEO15)

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Baby Led Weaning the Paleo Way

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babyledweaning

My son was 4 months old when I started eating Paleo. I knew that I wanted to introduce solid foods to him at around 6-7 months or when he started showing signs of readiness. When he started grabbing at my plate and sticking my food in his mouth, I knew he was ready! I wanted to do baby led weaning with him…and I knew I wanted to do it the Paleo way (if there was one!).

What is Baby Led Weaning?

Simply put, baby led weaning means letting your baby feed themselves. You just put out the food for them to grab and they feed themselves. Baby led weaning, also, does away with puree foods. In essence, you give large chunks of food for the baby to gnaw on. No spoon is involved. No ice cube trays. No time spent making homemade pureed baby food. No money spent on expensive homemade baby food equipment. You give your baby what you are eating in pieces that they are able to pick up and eat. At around 6 months, most babies are ready for the small step into solid foods. By allowing them to control what they eat and HOW MUCH, you give them a jump start into appreciating and loving real food.

One of the negatives about spoon-feeding babies is that they do not control how much food is put into their bellies. Often they have issues with constipation, gas, and the feeling of being overfull. With baby-led weaning, the baby is allowed to suck and lick their food in large chunks. They control what they swallow. They are able to learn from the beginning how to properly chew their food. And just a forewarning, gagging is completely normal and you don’t need to freak out. I can’t even tell you how many times my son gagged on his food when he was learning how to chew and swallow. With spoon-feeding pureed baby food, the baby doesn’t learn how to chew their food from the start. You have to teach it to them much later in their toddlerhood, which can be very frustrating.

Why I Chose Baby-Led Weaning: 

  1. I was very attracted to this concept because we were eating Paleo. We were eating whole foods, no canned or frozen dinners. I knew I didn’t want to give cereal as a first food because of all the information I had read on how terrible cereal was as a first food for a baby. Not only does it replace more healthy foods, but babies, also, can’t digest grains well. Plus, I wasn’t eating grains because of their negative affect on my body, so why would I give my child grains as a first food?
  2. It is a lazy (easy) way to feed your child! Seriously, baby-led weaning was so easy. The concept is to give your child what you are eating. And the best thing about this is that it forces you to eat healthy because your baby is going to be eating the same food!
  3. Going out to a restaurant became so simple. And with a 2 year old and a infant in tow, I needed easy. I didn’t have to pack a small cooler with pureed foods for my son. I fed him off my plate!
  4. Baby-led weaning saved me time. Instead of spending hours pureeing his food, freezing it, and then thawing it to serve, I spent that time making a healthy meal for the whole family. There were times that I would mash the food up for him, but he never let me spoon feed him.
  5. The top 2 allergies of infants/toddlers is…drum roll…dairy and gluten. Egg whites is, also, pretty high. So, I wanted to avoid these altogether.
Feeding himself with a spoon at 8 months!
Feeding himself with a spoon at 8 months!

When I started eating Paleo, it wasn’t very popular. There weren’t many cookbooks or blogs about it. And there, definitely, wasn’t any information on doing baby-led weaning AND Paleo. However, I found that my son was naturally drawn to the taste of real food. And even though you may choose to do baby-led weaning, you still want to choose their first foods very wisely.

Eating steak and eggs (just turned 1)
Eating steak and eggs (just turned 1)

My Recommendations for First Foods in Order:

I recommend you, slowly, introduce solid foods to your baby. Reason being, you need to watch for any allergies. So, give it a good 4 days after you give your baby a new food before introducing another food. In those 4 days, if your baby shows any sign of allergies or extreme fussiness, hold off on giving that food again.

  1. Pastured Egg Yolk and Bone Stock – this should be the first food you let your baby try. Most babies, if allergic to egg, are allergic to the egg white. Softly cook this for them, add a little sea salt, and let them play with it and lick it off their fingers. Give them a small bowl of bone stock and let them suck it off their fingers. It’s filled with vitamins and minerals for them!
  2. Avocado – I loved avocado for my kids because it required no cooking. I slice them long so little hands can grab and gnaw on them.
  3. Sweet Potato – easy on the tummy and very tasty! We added a little butter (watching carefully for any allergies) and cinnamon. I served it in large chunks so he could hold them in his tiny hands and chew on the pieces.
  4. Squash of all kinds – I made squash the same way as sweet potato. Roasting them bring out a delicious flavor. Season the squash well and let your baby play!
  5. Carrots – peel and roast in stalks. Give whole stalks to your baby and allow them to gnaw on them.
  6. Broccoli/Cauliflower – be careful of gas! Leave in large pieces for your baby to hold. Add salt and olive oil/or butter to make it tasty!
  7. All other vegetables – give your baby all other vegetables from your plate! Now it’s starting to get fun, right?
  8. Meats of all kinds and organ meats – we started with roasted chicken legs…giving them to our son whole so he could gnaw on the end. He LOVED and still loves chicken legs! We then moved onto beef, then pork, then fish.
  9. Banana/Papaya/Pears – easier on the tummy than other fruits and softer.
  10. All other fruits – I preferred to introduce fruits last because I wanted my kids to not prefer the taste of sweet fruits. I wanted them to eat all other foods before they tried fruits.
Gnawing on a chicken leg
Gnawing on a chicken leg

After you have introduced all these foods and there are no present allergies, your baby can have whatever you are cooking! Yes, it really is that easy. You should wait till your baby is a year old before introducing egg whites or honey since those are also known to cause allergies.

As you can see, baby-led weaning the Paleo way is…

  • simple
  • less time consuming
  • extremely nutritious
  • and allows your baby to have control

As parents there are a few things in life that we just can’t control much, and one of them is what your children choose to eat. You can force feed, which I don’t recommend, but the more fun mealtimes will be if you just let your baby/child guide you in what they will eat. By starting them early on healthy foods, you give them a love for the real, whole foods.

Eating pieces of bratwurst and quartered cuts of grapes
Eating pieces of bratwurst and quartered cuts of grapes
I see a chicken leg and half eaten Scottish Egg!
I see a chicken leg and half eaten Scottish Egg!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cultivating the Love of Real Food in Our Children, Guest Post for Paleo Parents

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I had the incredible honor of guest posting for Paleo Parents. If you don’t know who Paleo Parents are, well then you need to go check them out. Their blog and cookbooks have been such a major part of my life as a Paleo family. I love everything that they stand for and their constant encouragement is so refreshing in this day-of-age.

Please go visit their page to read my guest post: Cultivating the Love of Real Food in Our Children

***Click here to read it!***

Also, Paleo Parents have put out two AMAZING Paleo cookbooks:

1. Eat Like a Dinosaur – a cookbook designed for kids!

2. Beyond Bacon – a cookbook designed for cooking with all parts of the hog!

Don’t forget to go read my post on why it’s so important to raise kids that appreciate and love their food. I give suggestions for involving them in the whole process of “farm to fork” and, also, give some great children’s book suggestions that help to cultivate that love of real food!

***Click here to read my post on Paleo Parents!***

 

Monkey Smoothie (or Monkey Popsicle)

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I’ve posted this simple recipe a few times on my Facebook page and I have had such a great response that I thought I should actually write-up a blog post on it.

My favorite thing about this recipe is that it is soooo filling! My kids LOVE when they hear the blender going! Hope you enjoy this as much as we do!

Monkey Smoothie (or Monkey Popsicle)

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Ingredients:

Directions:

1. Place all the ingredients in a blender and blend. If using frozen bananas then you may not need any ice cubes. If you are using unfrozen bananas, then throw in 5-8 ice cubes.

2. Top with raw carob nibs and enjoy!!! Makes enough for 2-3 servings so you can enjoy the smoothie now and freeze the rest!

3. POPSICLES: pour into popsicle molds and freeze! Makes 7 popsicles!

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Sh*t Paleo Kids Say

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Kids really do say the funniest things! Well, add Paleo to that and a little bit of crunchy and you got your self a hilarious mess!

 

Stealing my Kombucha!

 

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Here are a few things I have heard (and innocent bystanders) my kids say that make me literally LOL:

1. “Can I have my seaweed chips, MOM?”

2. “Mom, can you stop hogging all the KUMbucha and share?”

3. “Can I have some olives?”

4. “Mom, can you give me some coconut water?”

5. “My brother was born in a bathtub.”

6. “Can you wear me this time and not Frankie? I’m tired.”

7. “We drink milk from the hairy coconut.”

8. “My mom puts vinegar in my hair.”

9. “Why do we come to McDonalds to just play and not eat?”

10. “Mom, this milk is GROSS.”

“Oh honey, that is baby milk.” (pumped breastmilk)

11. “Mommy, I didn’t have my honey today yet.”

12. “Stop putting garlic in my ears”

13.  “Stop putting onions beside my bed.”

14. “Can I have my vitamin d drops?”

15. “Can we have brussel sprouts tonight?”

16. “Why is he eating French fries and I have fruit?”

17. “Mom, there’s a diaper in the toilet. I need to go potty. Can you wash this diaper?”

18. “There’s a dryer ball in my pile of clothes.”

19. “There’s a soap nut in my pile of clothes.”

20. “Mom, can I have some more bacon?”

21. “Can I have some more bone broth?”

22. “Can I have some more almond butter on my spoon?”

23. “Why are you putting coconut oil in your hair?”

24. Why are you putting coconut oil on my toothbrush?”

25. “Why are you putting coconut oil on my butt?”

26. “Why are you putting coconut oil in my smoothie?”

27. “Daddy got poop in his eye when he was using the diaper sprayer!”

28. “Papa gave me lots of candy today. Am I in trouble?”

29. “Can I hold those chicken feet before you throw them in the soup?”

30. “Why do people call me weird?”

 

What do your Paleo kids say that you find funny?