The Paleo Mama

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My Natural Miscarriage

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Misty sunrise over the field

DISCLAIMER: This story is about miscarriage and what my body went through. Read at your own discretion. 

Some of you knew that I was carrying our 3rd child. But what some of you probably do not know is that I miscarried our 3rd child in late June. I haven’t talked about it much. It just happened and I tried to move on.

Now I’m ready to talk about it and I want to share my story for a few reasons.

One, it’s part of my healing process…I am ready to open up about it and I know this will be very therapeutic to me.

Two, I want to share what a natural miscarriage is like in the comfort of your own home.

Three, this life I carried is worth talking about…even if I only carried him/her for 13 weeks.

Four, more women need to talk about miscarriage. It’s very taboo, yet it happens to to many.

The Story

I was at 13 weeks and things felt like they were going great. I had my energy back. I wasn’t sleeping all the time. I was able to catch up on work that I had put behind me. And I was finally back to my normal pre-pregnancy self! I celebrated getting over the hump of the first trimester with my husband and the relief that every woman seems to feel when they move past that 12 week hump.

Then one afternoon I had some spotting. It wasn’t a lot and it wasn’t enough to worry me. I knew spotting during pregnancy was normal. I had carried 2 other babies full term. But it kept happening. Not a lot of blood, just a little.

I finally told my husband as we were doing the evening chores. He showed concern…which then made feel feel more concerned. He told me I should call my midwife and just talk it over with her. It was a Friday night.

My midwife told me that spotting was completely normal but if I had any concern that I could have it looked at. It was Friday night so the only thing I could do was go to the ER or wait to come in to her office on Monday morning.

My husband and I decided that we didn’t want to wait till Monday so we went into the ER…with both our kids in tow because we couldn’t find anyone to watch them.

They took me back and told my husband that he wouldn’t be able to be with me because he had our 2 kids with him. I was super pissed about this but was strong and said it would be alright. Up until this point I didn’t have any cramping, but then I started to feel a dull pain in my lower back. That was when it finally hit me that a miscarriage was probably inevitable. With both my children, I had back labor, so I recognized this pain.

I was rolled into the ultrasound technician’s room and she placed the cold doppler on my small pregnant bump. For about 5 minutes she pushed buttons, took measurements, but DIDN’T SAY A  THING TO ME. I was irritated and asked her if everything was alright. She said she had to go grab a doctor. My heart sank.

A doctor came back in with her, they both looked at the screen, and then they both walked out. I layed there on the hospital bed wanting it all to be over.I wanted them to tell me the baby was gone and be done with it. Why was this whole process taking so long?

The ultrasound technician came back in and STILL did not look or talk to me. I said, “Excuse me, ma’am, could you please tell me what’s going on?” She FINALLY looked at me and said, “I’m not supposed to say anything.” Then I simply said, “Is the baby gone?” And she nodded her head yes.

I laid on that hospital bed in a daze. It seemed like 10 minutes before anyone came and got me and rolled me back to my room. I actually felt very emotionless. I felt numb. I felt betrayed, once again, by my body.

The ER doctor came in to give me my results…which he didn’t know I already had. I think she was expecting me to break down and cry and hold my hand and was surprised when I said, “Can I please go home now?” She wanted to talk about a DNC and I said no. I wanted my body to release the baby naturally.

I went home that Friday night with my husband and my 2 kids and another broken heart. I had a miscarriage before but it was early on. I was nearly in my second trimester this time. So, I tried to move on with my weekend and just let my body do it’s job.

Saturday came. Nothing. Sunday came…nothing. Monday came…nothing. The waiting was torture.

Then Tuesday night I was outside helping with the farm chores in our pasture and I felt a sharp pain in my lower abdomen and then felt something slip out of me. I looked up at my husband and told him that it was beginning. The cramping was intense and I could barely stand up straight and walk inside to sit on the toilet. Once I got inside and sat down on the toilet I saw our baby.

I could see our babies eyes forming. I saw the feet and the toes. I saw five tiny fingers and from my best judgement our baby was a little boy. I sat on the toilet and I finally cried. I held our baby and couldn’t stop staring at him. The contractions I was having were very painful and it felt good to cry through them while holding my baby. He was worth it.

I set him down on the counter and tried to get up so I could go get my husband. He came in and I showed him our baby. We both held each other and kissed our baby goodbye. I asked my husband to bury him under my favorite maple tree, and so he did.

My husband came back in and was with me EVERY second. I felt a gush of water flow down my legs and knew that was the water breaking. I sat down on the toilet for what seemed like an hour after this. The contractions and pain were so hard and the next 24 hours were very much like birth. I bled a lot and had huge clots that I passed. I thought I had passed the placenta with the water that broke but I was wrong. I’m not sure what I was birthing, but I was grateful my husband was holding my hand through it all.

My back was on fire and at some point it slowed down and my husband helped clean me up and put me in bed. He applied my essential oils to my body. A soothing blend on my back pain, white fir and lavender on my abdomen and clary sage over my abdomen as well. Thankfully, I slept pretty good that night but the next morning was another day of intense contractions and lots of bleeding. The contractions and the cramping went on for 2 days. The bleeding slowed down after about 24 hours. I still was passing clots and I was unsure how long this was going to last. It was Tuesday when this started and on Thursday I felt things slowing down.

Then a huge contraction came. I got up and told my husband I feel like pushing. He directed me to the toilet and I sat down and pushed. The placenta (which was the size of my hand) shot out of me and I felt so relieved. I told my husband I just delivered the placenta and he went in to make sure that was what it was. He showed it to me and I cried as I looked at it…the organ that nourished my baby for 13 weeks was now out of my body. He asked if I wanted to keep it and I told him to bury it with our baby.

From the moment the placenta came out, my body felt 100 times better. The emotional torture of the whole process was worth it.  I got to hold my baby, say goodbye and bury him.

It’s been over 2 months since I said goodbye to my 4th, and final, baby. We tried for a third and I am 100% positive that I cannot go through this again. I was so grateful that I let my body naturally miscarry and that I didn’t opt for a DNC. I was so grateful that I was at home…even though it was not the home birth I was hoping for.

Sometimes in tragedy we find our life’s purpose…

And I have. My purpose and vision is for other women going through tragedy’s, such as mine, to find refuge and security from the storm. My purpose is to cry with them, love on them, encourage them…never show judgment…always love, always grace.

My heart goes out to all of you who have been down this road before. I pray that mercy washes over you and you find peace.

 

Jackie xoxo

Oil Pulling With Essential Oils

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Oil Pulling is an ancient detoxification practice that involves swishing oil around in your mouth for 15-20 minutes. The benefit of doing this is to reduce the amount of harmful bacteria, reduce dental plaque, remineralize your teeth, help with gum issues, and strengthen your gums. You can give your teeth an extra boost by oil pulling with essential oils.

When you swish oil around in your mouth, plaque get stuck to the oil and dissolve in the liquid oil. So you are removing a lot of bacteria, which is found in plague and leads to all kinds of oral health problems, every time you oil pull.

I added oil pulling to my life when I found out I had 6 cavities! I was able to heal these cavities naturally by eating a traditional diet with the proper nutrients and supplements added. You can click here to read more about how I healed my tooth decay. 

What Oil to Use:

Traditionally, sesame seed or sunflower oil was used among the early oil-pullers, however, my personal favorite is coconut oil because it has so many health benefits. You can use any oil that you like, just stay away from canola or vegetable oil.

Adding Essential Oils to Your Oil Pulling Regime:

Adding in therapeutic-grade, 100% pure, essential oils into your oil pulling regime is a great way to give your health a supercharge!  I buy my essential oils at wholesale price and I encourage you to do the same! You can CLICK HERE and learn how to get your essential oils from me at wholesale cost!

Here’s a few suggestions to help with oral issues:

  1. Peppermint essential oil.
  2. Clove essential oil.
  3. Basil essential oil.
  4. Melaleuca essential oil.
  5. Myrrh essential oil.
  6. OnGuard essential oil (my favorite choice).

How to Oil Pull:

  1. First thing in the morning, put 1 teaspoon-1 tablespoon of coconut/or sesame oil in your mouth. Use 1 teaspoon if you are just starting out or if you have a gag reflex. Swish it around till it melts.
  2. Open your mouth and add 2 drops of your favorite essential oil.
  3. Swish the oil around in your mouth (like you would with mouthwash) for 15-20 minutes. I like to push it through my teeth and around the sides of my mouth. Don’t swish hard or your cheeks will start to hurt! I do this while I’m doing my morning chores and milking the goat! But you can also do it while your getting ready in the morning!
  4. Spit the oil out in your trash can! Do not swallow it…it is now loaded with bacteria and toxins.
  5. Brush your teeth with a safe toothpaste! I use my homemade toothpaste, but THIS ONE is great if you can’t make your own!
  6. Happy Oil-Pulling!

 CLICK here to Start Using Essential Oils! 

Oil Pulling

 

 

Spiced Chai Lip Balm Recipe

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I love chai tea and the way the spices in a chai tea smell. I have been making my own lip balm for years now, usually I just put my All Purpose Salve on my lips, but I wanted something a little “fancier” so I created a delicious Spiced Chai Lip Balm recipe that I know you will enjoy.

I wanted to stay away from citrus essential oils because they are photo toxic and it is the summer! You can easily double or triple this recipe to make extras to give away to your friends!

A NOTE OF ESSENTIAL OILS: I only recommend therapeutic-grade essential oils. You can purchase therapeutic-grade essential oils at wholesale cost (CLICK HERE to learn more!).

DIY Spiced Chai Lip Balm

makes 10 3ml jars

INGREDIENTS: 

  • 1 Tablespoon of Coconut Oil 
  • 1 Tablespoon of Cacao Butter or Raw Shea Butter (can leave this ingredient out in the winter but it helps hold the balm together during the hot summer months)
  • 1 Tablespoon of Beeswax Pastilles
  • 1/4 Teaspoon of Castor Oil for shine
  • 1/4 Teaspoon of Vanilla
  • Essential Oils: 4 drops of Cinnamon Bark or Cassia, 4 drops of Ginger, and 4 drops of Clove. You can also substitute Black Pepper essential oil and/or Coriander Essential oil if you want! (where to buy)
  • Small Containers or reused lip balm tubes

DIRECTIONS: 

  1. Add the coconut oil to a small pan and simmer till melted.
  2. Add the beeswax pellets and cacao/or shea butter and simmer for about 5-10 minutes till melted.
  3. Add the castor oil. Stir and remove from stove.
  4. Let sit till the mixture is warm to the touch, but not thick. It’s easier to pour into containers when it is still liquid.
  5. Add in the vanilla and essential oils. Stir.
  6. Pour into your containers and enjoy!

Spiced Chai Lip Balm www.thepaleomama.com

Top 5 Essential Oils for Back to School

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Thinking kid

It’s just about that time again. Summer goes by so dang fast, doesn’t it? I went to the store the other day and saw moms and dads walking around with their shopping list in hand and a cart full of school supplies getting ready for their kids to go back to school.

But did you ever stop and think about how you can start to prepare your child’s body for school? Going from a safe home environment to a new class, new friends, new teachers, and new school is HARD on children. It’s a lot of NEW and lots of children do not do good with a lot of new.

So, I wanted to provide a list of essential oils that you can use to assist your child in settling into their new school environment.

A note on quality: I only use and recommend therapeutic-grade essential oils. All of these suggestions are based off the assumption that high-quality essential oils are being used. If you would like to get started using high-quality, therapeutic-grade essential oils, then you can CLICK HERE to learn how to get started!

Top 5 Essential Oils for Back to School:

  1. Peppermint & Wild Orange – this is a great blend to help your kids wake-up. They now have an alarm clock to wake up to, or you disturbing their slumber by turning on the light and singing, “school days, school days…good ole fashion rule days.” Put an essential oil diffuser in your kitchen and diffuse this “wake-up blend” while they are eating breakfast. Or you can put this blend in a roll-on bottle and roll it on their wrists and back of neck while you are “nicely” waking them up.
  2. Rosemary – Did you know rosemary can make you smarter? Rosemary is known to improve brain performance and mood. I recommend adding a drop or two to your children’s shampoo and using it to wash their hair, or rubbing a drop through their hair while they are eating breakfast before heading to school. You can, also, diffuse this oil before the kids leave for school or when they come home and work on homework.
  3. “Focus” Blend  – The focus blend contains oils that have been studied and used traditionally for their abilities to promote calmness, focus and a balanced state of mind. Many of these oils contain high levels of sesquiterpenes, which have been proven to pass the blood-brain barrier to reach the cells of the brain. It’s primarily used for helping ease stress and improve concentration. I like to apply this blend to the back of my children’s neck as they are eating breakfast. You can talk with your school about letting your children apply it during school hours.
  4. Lemon – Lemon is known as “The Oil of Focus“. It’s citrusy aroma nourishes the mind and aids in concentration. Lemon is a wonderful aid for children who are struggling with school. It is especially helpful in cases of learning disabilities. It pairs well with Rosemary, so you can make a roller bottle with Rosemary and Lemon and apply to the back of the neck or diffuse this powerful duo before school.
  5. “Calming” Blend  – Children who are hyperactive or have difficulty concentrating could really benefit from this blend. It contains essential oils that are often used to calm and soothe feelings of stress and excitement. It’s great to help wound up kids calm down and settle in for a restful sleep. I like to give my kids a detox bath at night using this blend or diffuse it in their room for an hour before bed. You can, also, apply it to the backs of their necks or feet before school (if they are very hyperactive) or at bedtime.

WHERE TO BUY THESE OILS: If you are wondering where to buy all these oils, you are in luck! I use all these oils on my children and started with purchasing a wholesale enrollment kit. I would love to help you start learning more about essential oils. You can CLICK HERE to see how so many have started their essential oil journey.

Top 5 Essential Oils for Back to School The Paleo Mama

Whipped Sleepytime Rub

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Winding down at night can be tough at times. I know my mind keeps going for minutes and sometimes hours after I lay my head down on my pillow. The same goes for our kids.

Sometimes we expect that as soon as we shut the door, they are going to be sweet little angels and fall asleep. Most the time we are proven wrong!

Our nightly routine has become essential at our house. I notice that the nights we go from dinner to bed is CRAZY. The kids are not ready to rush rush rush and then get in bed. So, I stopped expecting it from them and started taking our bedtime routine a little more seriously.

Now we eat dinner at the table as family and then we slowly start getting ready for bed. The kids take a nice relaxing bath, sometimes a detox bath, with certain essential oils in it, and then we get all snuggled up in our pajamas and read books.

During our reading time I apply essential oils to my kids. They absolutely love this! The 3 main oils I choose to apply are Frankincense, Lavender, and Vetiver because these oils promote a nice, restful sleep.

Whipped Sleepytime Rub

makes 1/2 cup

INGREDIENTS: 

Other oils to use: you can substitute any of the above oils with Ylang Ylang, Roman Chamomile, Cedarwood, orClary Sage. All these oils promote relaxation and a restful night’s sleep!

DIRECTIONS: 

  1. Add the coconut oil and the cacao butter to a small pan and simmer till melted.
  2. Let rest on the counter for 10 minutes.
  3. Add the essential oils to the pan and then put it in the fridge for an hour.
  4. You want it to be firm but not too hard. Then whip it on high with an electric mixer until the mixture softens and forms peaks.

HOW TO APPLY: 

  • Take a small pea-sized amount and massage it into your feet or your children’s feet before bed.
  • Sleepy tight!

Whipped Sleepy-time Rub
Yields 1
A luscious homemade body cream to apply to yourself before bedtime!
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Prep Time
15 min
Cook Time
10 min
Prep Time
15 min
Cook Time
10 min
Ingredients
  1. 1/4 cups of Cacao (or Cocoa) Butter
  2. 1/4 cups of coconut oil
  3. 20 drops of therapeutic grade Lavender
  4. 12 drops of Vetiver
  5. 10 drops of Frankincense
Instructions
  1. Add the coconut oil and the cacao butter to a small pan and simmer till melted.
  2. Let rest on the counter for 10 minutes.
  3. Add the essential oils to the pan and then put it in the fridge for an hour.
  4. You want it to be firm but not too hard. Then whip it on high with an electric mixer until the mixture softens and forms peaks.
The Paleo Mama https://thepaleomama.com/
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Tallow Butt Balm

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Tallow Butt Balm | www.thepaleomama.com.001

I’m so excited to have my friend Kate from Venison for Dinner (don’t ya just love that name!) sharing this AWESOME recipe on my blog today. Kate is a stay at home mom of 2 little boys living a homemade life on the West Coast of British Columbia. She enjoys to cook and bake from scratch. Through hunting and homesteading, Kate and her family produce more than enough to fill their own meat and dairy needs, happily helping others start their own homesteading journey along the way. Kate also has a passion for essential oils and home healing with natural medicine. You can follow her on HER BLOG and Facebook page as she hones her homesteading skills, making her ‘whey’ through one mountain of raw milk at a time. Maybe you too will be inspired to butcher your own deer or try your hand at natural medicine!

Please welcome Kate…

You know the scene, you’re changing a diaper, you open it up and baby’s got a sore bum. It hurts YOU to see their bum all red and you want that pain GONE!

So what do you reach for? You grab the the diaper rash cream and you smear it all over. But did you know that many of those commercial creams contain petroleum products, as well as oils that are most likely rancid, alcohols, and so many more ingredients I can barely pronounce! (And I’m a good reader!) Here a popular diaper rash cream company discloses every ingredient. I was shocked at how these are allowed to be put on our precious babies skin! Your other option is to buy natural creams, which, lets be honest, aren’t always that natural, or cost you a good chunk of change.

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After our second child was born we got serious about making all our own natural personal care products! My sister made us a fancy salve that we used and while terrific, it was complicated to make. I then came up with my 3 ingredient Diaper Rash Ointment and while it’s such a basic and effective ointment to whip together…Mama’s got a new balm in town!

TALLOW!

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When we originally made tallow from the milk cow we had to butcher, we only used it for cooking. Then recently we were lucky enough to be gifted loads of grass-fed Jersey fat from a friends steer and since it was fresh I got to work processing it. (using the same process as this lard.) After it was cooled down I made a balm since I’d seen ideas for it all over the web, and before I knew it, it had become my go-to “Butt Balm”! The beauty of this thick salve is that it’s pretty much the same texture at all average room temperatures (unlike the coconut oil based diaper rash ointment I also use that drastically fluctuates) and it works as a barrier cream AND a ‘medicated’ cream for rashes.

So what is Tallow vs Lard? Tallow is the rendered fat from a ruminant (Cow, Deer, Sheep, etc) whereas Lard is the rendered fat from a single stomached mammal (Pig, Bear, etc). Tallow has a stronger taste that lard so while it doesn’t pair as well with sweet foods, its amazing for savoury cooking. Why is our Tallow so yellow? Jerseys (And Guernseys to my knowledge) can’t process Beta Carotene. That’s what makes carrots orange, and it’s also in the hay and grass they eat. Instead of digesting it, they deposit it in fat! That’s why jersey cream is especially yellow (even more so in time of lots of green grass) and in the fat in their meat!


Why would I want to smear beef fat on my baby’s bum?! I bet you won’t take me just saying “Because you should!!: So here’s the top reasons we choose to make our own Tallow Butt Balm;

  • Tallow is high in saturated fats with a similar profile to those just below our skin, therefore it’s easily absorbed leaving skin feeling well nourished. This helps regenerate new skin. It’s important to use GRASS FED tallow to really reap the benefits.
  • Quality Control! I recommend you purchase therapeutic-grade essential oils. 
  • Frugal! I save loads of money by making my own Butt Balm. Yes I was given the beef fat for free, but even if you tracked down and bought it I bet you’d still save money. Better yet, if you’re buying 1/4 or 1/2 a cow, ask to get the fat back with it! You’ll find more uses that just a butt balm.
  • I want to use natural/as close to nature, well raised, animal products wherever I can because I believe good fats are good for you! (And I know Jackie agrees!) Petroleum products have no place on a person’s body!
  • Let’s just say Mama takes a dab for her face and hands on a regular basis two 😉 Might as well kill two lotion birds with one stone right!?

Tallow Butt Balm

Makes enough to fill a 1 cup ‘Salmon’ or ‘Jam’ jar. The amount of essential oils makes it a just below 1% dilution.

INGREDIENTS:

 

DIRECTIONS:

  1. GENTLY melt tallow and olive oil together over LOW heat, just until melted. If you’ve accidentally heated too much, no fear, but let it cool down until you can comfortably hold you finger in before adding in essential oils.
  2. Now slather away knowing you’ve made a terrific ‘butt balm’ for your baby! (I won’t tell if you put it on your own skin!)

tallow butt balm pinterest.jpg