The Paleo Mama

Homegrown and Handmade

best friends

Soul Sisters

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Best_Friends_Forever_by_toxicdisaster_xWe make friends. We lose friends. We delete Facebook friends that don’t comment enough. We search for Facebook friends from our childhood. We let go of friends who hurt us. We cling to friends who encourage us. We miss friends that forget about us. And we are confused when friends betray us.

This is life. Friends come and go, sometimes without saying goodbye; sometimes with just one click of a button.

We all have friends. Surface friends. Friends that think they know what is going on in our life by reading Facebook. Why is it so hard for women to have real friends? Why do women make it so hard to be let in? We guard and protect like we are a Lioness protecting her young, except this time, it’s our heart that we are protecting. Is it because we have been hurt so many times in the past by women?

I admire my 3 year old daughter when she is playing someplace new. I watch how she makes immediate friends with a new little girl playing in the same place. There is no, “hi, how are you? Where you from? What’s your name?”. Nope, it’s a visual eye contact with the other little girl, a smile, and then the 2 girls are playing together and traveling to magical lands.

It takes us women months and months to develop that level of friendship. We have to get past all the fakeness first. We have to put on a “SuperMOM” front. And, THEN, if they are still sticking around…then, we MIGHT just let them in a little bit.
When I think about the women, my soul sisters, that are IN…they are in me and understand me…it’s always the ones who didn’t put on a mask from the beginning.

It’s the soul sister that farted or belched in front of me. Or the soul sister that said the “F-word” in front of me. It’s the soul sister that hugged my heart instead of my shoulders. It’s the soul sister made me feel like I didn’t have to try to be Supermom, I could just be my broken, goofy, and messy self.

These soul sisters are stuck with me forever.

Memoirs of a Sister: Day 1

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I’ve decided to dedicate this next month of my blogging to my sister. Each day I’m going to post a random memory of Dinah until September 23, the day she died. I figured this might help me as we approach the one year anniversary mark of her passing. You see, I don’t want to forget Dinah, I want to celebrate her beautiful life.

And so here I begin…these memoirs of my sister…some may be beautiful. Some may only make me laugh. Some may bring you to tears. This is her life.

Growing up me and Dinah were just like most sisters. When we fought, we fought hard. When we laughed, we laughed so hard that our abs hurt the next day. And when someone disrespected us, we defended each other’s honor.

Dinah was arrested once. This makes me chuckle just thinking about it. Dinah and I were going to the movies one night and as we were standing in line for tickets, a really tall and muscular man was standing behind us. It was our turn to go buy our movie ticket and we were being loud and laughing (like we always were). I guess he was annoyed with us and he butted us in line and went up to the ticket counter. I said, “Excuse me, sir, it’s our turn and you just jumped in front of us.” He didn’t like that so he started yelling at me and walked over to me and called me a bitch.

I looked at Dinah and said to forget him. Then this man proceeded to come in my face and call me a “cunt”. Something in Dinah switched into protective sister mode and she ran over to this giant man (who we found out later had a black belt) and starting punching the living poo out of him. She ended up ripping his shirt and went all cat-woman crazy by kicking him where it counted! Oh my, this just makes me laugh.

Thankfully, the man didn’t raise a hand to Dinah. I ended up peeling Dinah off of him and the cops, who were already on the scene, separated us. The douch-bag pressed charges and Dinah was hand-cuffed and driven away in a cop car. I stood there in horror as to what I was going to tell our parents. I think Dinah was still in highschool and I was in college. We were both still living at home, so I drove home and had the honor of telling our parents that Dinah was just arrested. LOL…oh Dinah.

She was released later that night but went through years of community service and anger management! We never let her live the anger management part down!

I hold this memory close to my heart. Dinah protected me. She defended my honor even though the offender was HUGE.

She was fearless.

She was brave.

She was impulsive.

She was Dinah.