If you’re expecting some extreme circumstance that led to my decision to pull my little farm girl from public school and homeschool, then you are going to be unhappy. Sometimes decisions are made, not on impulse or out of anger, but because we simply decided to listen to something that all mothers possess…our mommy gut.
My mommy gut has been screaming at me for years to homeschool my children but when the time came in August to enroll her in public school, I found myself, reluctantly, at the open house and shaking hands with her extremely nice and lovable Kindergarten teacher.
This post isn’t about bashing the public school system. I loved my daughter’s Kindergarten teachers and so did my daughter. This post is about some things that we might all have in common. I love teachers and I think they do an amazing job at nurturing our children the best that they can. However, I’m better at nurturing my children then they are…because I’m their mommy.
Today is my daughter’s last day in public school. Here’s a short list of things that helped us come to this decision.
5 Reasons Why I Put My Child in Public School…and Regretted It:
1) I Was Too Busy
I’m always too busy. Too busy for this and too busy for that and no time for anything extra. And let’s face it, homeschool is EXTRA. I made excuses how I couldn’t do it and there was no free time in my schedule. Granted, I was VERY busy at the beginning of the year but my daughter should have come first.
2) I Couldn’t Do It:
The responsibility of educating my child was going to be in my hands??? No way jose’! I doubted myself, my abilities to be able to give her ALL she needs and I took no responsibility. I didn’t want it. It’s much easier to pass this off to a actual, real “teacher” instead of owning up to it myself.
3) It’s “Just” Kindergarten:
She’s gonna go play half the day and make friends. There’s no real learning in Kindergarten…right? I can brush this year off and start to really focus on what we want to do in first grade.
4) I’ll Have No “Me” Time
Sometimes this girl drives me crazy and I think we would be better if we had a little space. She goes to school and then comes home to me and that time away will be just what we need. Mommy needs time to herself and time away makes me appreciate them so much more.
5) She Needs Friends
Little Farm Girl is one of the most lovable, sociable girls I have ever met. She has the personality of her father…a social butterfly that thrives on being around people. I can’t take this from her and keep her home. I need to allow her to have her time with her friends.
SHUT UP Jackie!
Seriously, I’m killing myself with all these negative talks I have going on in my brain. I go back-and-forth and I’m, constantly, overcoming my own personal doubts. But one thing I have learned about myself over the last few years is: 1) never let doubt make a decision. 2) Never say never. 3) If your heart is speaking it, JUST DO IT.
You see I feel so relieved to have overcome those 5 reasons! I, literally, BROKE each one and overcame the doubt that I would not be able to do this.
I made a plan and I am going to make this work!
5 Reasons Why I CAN Homeschool:
1) I Am Busy, but Never Too Busy
My kids come first. Their education is very important to me. I am so blessed to be able to work from home. I’m even more blessed that my income is retiring my husband very soon! So, yes, I am busy right now, but I have time for my little Farm Girl. Time is something that is coming and going so fast. I am, literally, watching my children grow up before my own eyes. THIS is the perfect opportunity to savor their lives and learn together. I am so excited about this opportunity to homeschool them! And you know what? When I add my kids education to my plate, I take something off that is not fulfilling me. Easy peasy!
New Homeschooling Mom Suggestion: Get over yourself and hire someone to clean your house OR download this awesome app that helps you keep up with daily cleaning tasks!
2) I TOTALLY Can Do This!
I am smart. I am productive. I am creative. I can teach my children about life and the world around them. I have the resources at my fingertips!
We appreciate a literature-based approach to education. In fact, the more I was learning and researching about Common Core Standards (which are the standards that are the foundation to most public schools), the more I was worried about what they were learning. I wanted my child to be an individual. In my opinion, Common Core is the widget approach to education. With the right processes and production standards, they can manufacture students the same way they manufacture products. Like any successful industry, efficiency and consistent outcomes are the name of the game. Apply that model to education, and Common Core makes sense to them.
The problem is, my child is not a widget, and education is not designed to produce economic automatons.
Great video on Common Core:
So, we ordered Sonlight curriculum. I needed something to really help me get moving this first year. Something that was SPELLED out for me. I needed organization and a schedule and something just TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO! I love the Charlotte Mason approach and I plan on implementing that into our education, as well. But this first year, as I get my feet wet, we will be using the Sonlight curriculum.
3) It’s More than JUST Kindergarten
It’s a foundation. It’s showing her the world around her. It’s experiencing things together. It’s about learning together. Her teacher last week told us that she had already “passed” Kindergarten in her first month of being in school. Well, what the heck is she gonna do the rest of the year? Now, I can meet her where she is at. If she moves on to first grade reading by Christmas, then so be it. If we have to repeat math next year, then so be it!
I GET TO TEACH MY DAUGHTER TO READ and that is an amazing thing! The ability to read is something she will use every, single day for the rest of her life and I get to teach that to her!
4) It’s NOT About Me
Who cares if I have no “me” time. I had kids and they are more important than me. Plus, I can make time for myself when I need it (hello YMCA…I’m hear to “work out” for 2 hours)…hehe, just kidding (not really).
Why does my “me” time need to be alone. My “me” time will turn into WE time and we can discover the world together. We can get haircuts and pedicures together DURING SCHOOL HOURS (gasp!) and we can go to the nearby waterfalls and sit and read. There’s so much to do and I’m not worried about myself anymore. I’m worried about her.
5) She Will Have So Many Friends
She already has her first homeschool art function today at a nearby art museum! I’m picking her up at lunchtime and we are going right there! She didn’t even want to go to her last day of public school today because she is so ready to get out of the classroom.
I signed up for local homeschool association. OMG there is so much stuff to do. Probably more than I’ll be able to do with my kids. Also, she will have some enrichment classes at a local Montessori school! I was so happy to be able to give her this! I love Montessori and there is a local school that has a Kindergarten curriculum.
I CAN TOTALLY DO THIS…and you know what, YOU CAN TOO!
A beautifully written account of what most all home school parents contemplate when trying to make the best decision for our children – and for ourselves! I love that you are incorporating some Montessori activities. I am a homeschooling mom who has also experienced public school, “umbrella” school, parochial school, and an arts magnet school – as well as Montessori! I am a huge fan of Montessori philosophies and methods. I have home-schooled my children in three different states – kindergarten through high school. I wish I could say that with each school year the decision was always clear cut. That hasn’t been the case for us. With the approach of every school year, I have had to consider the resources available (depending on our location), and the unique needs of each child. At times, I have employed *extra tutors and special needs therapies. There were certainly times (with frequent job transfers) that home school afforded us the most continuity in our children’s education. My youngest child is now 14. I must say that with him I have had the least concern over the home school decision, but I do not rule out remaining flexible to accommodate his expanding interests. We do truly love home school. Fortunately, my circumstances allow me to continue to home school as a (now) single parent. Thank you for bringing up your personal feelings about “Core Curriculum”. Every parent should take the time to research the “Core Curriculum” that is now employed in public (and some private) schools. (*I employed tutors while my child was in public school.)
I could have wrote this same blog 10 years ago!
You will not regret one moment of the time you invest in this adventure.
I know am teaching grade 10, 9, 6, 4, 1 and Kinder and if I can do it so can you.
I think what you’re doing is great – of course, I’m a homeschool mom too! I think Sonlight is great but don’t let it control your day…it can be very overwhelming and time consuming. Don’t make yourself believe you have to do it all. Just use the parts you like and that work for you both. It would be, in my opinion, VERY worthwhile to keep researching the Charlotte Mason approach. There’s lots of good books and sites out there 🙂
Yes! That is what I plan on doing! I hope to figure things out as we go and the CM approach is what I feel is going to be a great fit for my kids!
Not sure why they call it homeschool lol We were never home. Glad you listened to your gut. Welcome to the family 🙂
Praise God for your willingness to say YES to the call. The graces will be given. Have a blessed year and enjoy the journey.
<3
Jackie, thank you so much for being so open and honest. I am a SAHM and my oldest 2 (2nd and 4th) go to public school and I am literally watching Common Core suck the creativity and joy out of their educational experience. My Mama gut is telling me to take them out of school and teach them from home with my 4 year old and 2 year old. I have taught my 4 year old to read, write, count, his ABC’s. shapes, colors, etc. I worry about the “me” time too. I believe that it will be hard at first but we will all eventually learn as we go and get the hang of it. My 2nd grader has ADHD but she is ahead in her class. She just has a hard time focusing at times and sitting still in class. I have so many great ideas about homeschooling and because we are moving we may even be able to dedicate an entire room in our home for their classroom…
Awesome Nicole!!! I have so many ideas too and cannot wait to start experiencing the world with them!
I taught public middle school for 9 years (English). My decision to homeschool was based on seeing how the public school system worked, how decisions about curriculum were made, how priorities were determined within each district, each school, and each grade level. There are so many good teachers I worked with, good people often working hard to do a good job, stuck in a system that made teaching harder than it had to be. Even with nine years of teaching and a degree in education, I was terrified of homeschooling my own children. I didn’t start with a kindergartener, but with my high school step-daughter, who had found every way possible to slip through the cracks in the public system. Home school for her was a last resort. It was more successful than public school, but I won’t hold her up as a great example of home school success either. I was so discouraged, but I knew I didn’t want to throw my other children into the local public schools (I just got a note from my niece, who’s oldest is the same age and grade as my oldest. Due to the curriculum changes caused by common core, his class has to learn 2 years of math this year. “They’ll always have gaps,” the school explained to the parents. Excuse me?!) SO I read and read and read some more, and I jumped into it. Some days, it was so, so hard to get us going. Some days, I wanted to quit. And then, when we started this year (oldest is in 2nd grade, so we’re on our third year), things clicked. I’d been trying to find how things work, and I found our groove (for now). It will change from year to year, but I think I’m figuring out how to find that groove. People always ask me about “Giving up my dreams” or never getting to do my stuff, and well, yeah, other things have been put back, or moved out of my life for now. I have other priorities. Hobbies can wait. The time I put into my kids now is an investment I won’t have another chance at later.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience!!!
I had many of the same doubts with homeschool before we made the leap. We went to Ecuador for 3 months and didn’t have any choice but to homeschool. Once we started though, I never wanted to put them back in public school. We love it! I have taught my daughter to read and love that I was able to do that! I have a few posts on my blog about homeschool and the curriculum we did and are now using!
You will love the flexibility and freedom you have to nurture their interests, while providing them with a wonderful education.
Good luck!
This made my heart sing.
My very favorite thing about homeschooling was teaching my kids to read….and all four had different learning styles so it really challenged me to meet them where they learned best. I am so glad you followed your mommy gut…you are so right about your classroom is now the world. Welcome to the adventure…there will be good days and not so good but that is okay. You and Frank got this! 🙂
Thank you Trish!!! <3 Love you!
I am so happy to read this!!! I currently work 3 12 hours days a week and am ready to pull my babies out and homeschool! I just don’t understand how I can send them to school for 7 hours a day (plus another hour on the bus) and they still have homework. I agree that an education is very important but they should be allowed to enjoy family time and other activities. By the time they get off the bus it is almost 4pm. Which doesn’t leave a lot of time to cook, eat and clean up a healthy meal, have family time, practice for soccer and do homework! There is more to life! Good luck Jackie, I hope to be following suit shortly.
Thank you Jenny! Good luck to you too!
Thank you for this article! I homeschool my son and I love it. I am scared to ever let him go to public school. You will love this experience!
I was actually the exact opposite of you. 🙂 I homeschooled my daughter through Kindergarten and finally had to give in to my Mommy gut and enroll her in public school. I just knew it was what she needed. I was homeschooling for me – not her. It was the best decision I’ve ever made. Thankfully we were able to find a charter school that follows a classical education model so the transition was a little less painful for me since they were using the same curriculum I had wanted to use. Everyone is healthy, happy and life is so much better now. I wish the same for you as you homeschool your little one!
Thank you Camille!
Good for you! I love Charlotte Mason’s method; we incorporate it in our little homeschool, too. I have a 7 year old and a 5 year old and homeschooling is my most favorite part of my life. SO… CM recommendations:
1. Ambleside online – http://www.amblesideonline.org – a free, delightful, and excellent K-12 curriculum. Bonus: many of the books used are free in the public domain for ereaders; a lively Forum and fb page for support and questions, and links to the original CM series. We are in our second year of Ambleside and I just love it so much.
2. The Gentle Art of Learning, by Karen Andreola, and For the Children’s Sake by Susan Schaeffer MacAuley. So inspirational and encouraging.
I don’t want to overwhelm you with stuff, but I could just natter on and on about how interesting and delightful this method has proven so far. Best of luck to you!
Thank you so much Karis! I have both those books and have been on Ambleside a few times! Great resources!
I loved your article and your reasons! I have five children and we started homeschooling when the oldest was 10 (he was smart and quiet and begged me to homeschool). Now I’m looking back on 22 years of homeschooling and getting teary-eyed. My oldest has his own business, the next graduated cum laude with a degree in Biology, the third got a degree as an Occupational Therapy Assistant and immediately got a job making $30 an hour (at 21) My only daughter graduated last spring. She is sensitive, quiet, artistic, and the current system of education would have traumatized her (though I appreciate the dedicated teachers that give their best). I’m down to one almost 16 year old and I love watching the person he is becoming. I will be forever grateful for those crazy, hectic, loving, sometimes chaotic years that I had the privilege to homeschool.
Thanks for sharing, Jackie. I have a close family friends who pulled their son from public school to homeschool. It was the best decision they could have made for their child. He is twice exceptional: gifted, with a learning disability. They have a great program for him at home and work very hard to meet all of his unique needs. I even get to help out as a reading tutor and educational consultant. I admire parents willing to take on the responsibilities and rewards of homeschooling their children.
As a public school special education teacher, I know that the public school education system is not the best educational fit for every child. Legally, we are required to provide a free, appropriate education. What’s BEST for a child might not be possible in a public school setting given the multitude of constraints inherent in the system.
Congratulations on making the plunge, I wish you the best of luck and have fun discovering the world with your child!
Thank you so much James!
Two things I have not ever regretted, nursing my babies the first couple or so years of their lives, and homeschooling them. I’ve been homeschooling at least one of my three kids (2 grown) for 16 of the past 18 years; it is tough but so worth it. To the mom who sent her daughter to the little classical school after homeschooling her in kindergarten: it sounds like you’ve found a nice school and I hope it works out well for your family; sometimes life circumstances do not allow us to homeschool or to homeschool well–been there. Our family has found it to be true that there are benefits and drawbacks to all types of schooling (we’ve done home, online, private, and public school); we can’t expect perfection. However, even one year of homeschooling changes a parent in ways that are hard to describe, and that one year is a gift of time together that you will always cherish. A dear friend of mine home schooled her five boys through 7th-8th grade. Two weeks before graduation, her oldest was killed in a motorcycle accident, seven years ago. I can’t tell you how many times she tells me how grateful she was to have spent so much time with him during his home school years, and I am sure his brothers feel the same. Often people expect all home schooled children to be high achieving geniuses. While it is true that many are very bright and mature, that is not the only, or most important point in home schooling. Home schooling can be an opportunity for your kids to grow and mature in all kinds of knowledge, character, values, critical thinking, and grow in close relationship with their family–not all of which are easliy measured, but are important nonetheless. I want to end by saying that I appreciate the many positive comments about public school teachers. Their task is a difficult one, particularly under the ever increasing regulations that control their classrooms; I appreciate those who have taught my older children well when they were no longer home schooled. And to Paleo Mama, best wishes for a long and happy home schooling career.
Perfectly said Tracy! I treasure these years with my kids and can’t think of a better way to invest into their lives.
I was glad to hear you were homeschooling the other day, and I just saw your blog and saw you’re using Sonlight. We started with and stuck with Sonlight – 11+ yrs now! It’s great, and I’m sure you already know – don’t be a box checker and if you don’t use all the materials, no prob, it all resells very well. I tried but in the long run barely ever bothered with the LA materials, and spread science over a couple or 3 years for each one we ordered. Best wishes!
Thank you Tracy!
In 1984 I had been a public teacher for 14 years. I knew there was no way I would send my children to a public school, I knew what was really going on. We lived in a district that was honored for “high scores”. Even back then I knew my children were more than a test score. Those years did not provide support for homeschooling. We opted for a private school. THE BEST DECISION EVER MADE. Now after 43 years as a public teacher I am retired. (My nightmares are that they make me go back to teach.) I am saving like mad to pay tuition fees for my 2 grandchildren. It is really as simple as the video about the common core. The private school we chose was all about finding the strength of children, supporting it and bringing along the weaknesses. One motto I still use today….
CHILDREN ARE NOT THINGS TO BE MOLDED BUT PEOPLE TO BE UNFOLDED
BEST WISHES TO ALL OF YOU WHO CHOOSE TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE FOR YOUR CHILDREN
Thank you for this article!! I left my son’s parent teacher conference last night determined to find a better alternative. He should not “hate” going to school or learning, especially at 7 years old. You gave me the courage to follow my “mommy gut”.
I also appreciate everyone’s responses. You all have great tips! I have had endless self doubt regarding homeschooling my son, but I know I have this. I used to teach in the public schools and I don’t want common core machines as kids.
Thank you for sharing! I hope to see a follow up blog post about your experience with homeschooling. I have not yet decided whether or not we will homeschool our kids once they’re in kinder. I have many concerns, the first being that I won’t have enough time for myself. I think it’s a very valid concern, and I don’t feel like less of a Mom because of it. My needs are important too, and for me, me time absolutely 100% means just me, by myself, sans children. Perhaps when the time comes a solution will present itself. I would love to do it if I can share the load with another parent (my husband or another family). Best of luck, I hope you have a blast homeschooling.
Why didn’t I find this site sooner? You sound like the extended family I have been looking for. We just moved across country for my husband’s career, and are away from all our other family and friends. We are Paleo, homeschoolers with the same values you all seem to hold . I was starting to feel like a total mess and all alone. Reading this post, and all these replies has saved me. LOL! Thank you all! I love knowing there are other moms and families with the same values out there.
Jackie as a public school teacher and parent and as a teacher who will not bail on her students, the students who have no choice but to be in that classroom and are forced to play the “educational game” the “professionals” think is best for them, I’d just like to say Thank You. Thank you for not bashing the public school system. Thank you for making it about what is best for you and your children and not about how awful public schools are because there are some parents who have no choice but to allow public schools to educate their children. When people bash public schools it makes it sound as though it is a sub par education and parents who send their kids there do not care about their kids as much as those who home school or send them to private schools. I really appreciate you making it about you and your family! Unfortunately I have many students who have to come to the public school i teach at to eat, to feel loved and to feel like they are important and worth something. There is a need for public schools and there are really really awesome teachers that provide I really great education to their students. I’m so thankful to you that you understand that and didn’t bash them!!
I know how you feel, Nicole. My son was so smart, but he couldn’t stay quiet and still if his life depended on it. He was miserable in public school, for that very reason.
With homeschool, I was able to quickly spot the ‘ants in the pants’ moment approaching and see when his concentration was flagging and give him a break. He’d get fifteen minutes to run, do jumping jacks, pushups, climb a tree, etc… all with a huge grin on his face. Then it was back to work and he’d whip out his assignment in no time.
He needed to move as a child, so I let him. As an adult, he’s still very physical and quite athletic. He wasn’t built to sit still.
I don’t normally comment on blogs but I saw this on Pinterest and wanted to highly recommend the Christopherus Waldorf Homeschool curriculum. when I first pulled my son out of public school I was deciding on a curriculum and I’m BEYOND glad we chose this one. We bonded so much, had so much free time together, and it was one of the most wonderful experiences of my life. We loved it so much we moved near a Waldorf school to be near a community of people who also find the very human oriented approach to learning everything at the right stages in life to be of utmost importance. It hasn’t been just healing for my kids but all of us. Best of wishes on your journey!
I’m very familiar with the Waldorf system also, and love it. We use much of it also.
This is wonderful. Expressive truth. Thank you!